Lune et Soleil

We went to a party last night… The theme was “Come as your favorite Mythological Entity!” So Jesse and I were the Sun and Moon, respectively. Pictures coming soon. It was loads of fun, and Sandra crashed at our place. We’re going to see the B-52’s in a couple of weeks!! YAY!!!! And it’s at Hampton Beach… sigh. I’ve never been there, but I’ve heard how awesome it is. And perhaps I’ll check out the surf shop while I’m there.

There’s another surf shop in Newport, RI (near the cliff walk) and they do lessons and rentals and the like, so when Evan gets out of work (he’ll be done by the 18th, I think) then we can go together. I’m not sure I want to take a lesson by myself, but I’m sure it would be ok. There’s one teacher per every two students, so even if I got partnered up with a stranger, that might actually be better, you know. And then when I go down to Npt with E I’ll have a tiny bit of practice. sigh. surfing. ah. I can’t wait.

Speaking of not being able to wait, my accordion should have gotten looked at over the last couple of days, and I should have had a phone call by now telling me what’s wrong with it. I hope they didn’t do any repairs that I can’t afford right now. I want it fixed, but seeing as how I don’t have a job at the mo’ I can’t really go spending any more than I’ve allotted for this project. Ah well.

going away present

Judy and Pat got me a card and a little bear with the UMD logo on the shirt… so cute! I didn’t cry, though. I always get all dumb and sappy with stuff like that. I know I’ll be around and stuff, so it’s not like I’m leaving the country forever or anything. yeah. The bear is black with a little blue and yellow shirt (gosh our school colors are ugly). “You can put it in your office someday…” sweet. Judy said she’ll be happy to write a rec. letter for Simmons, word. (and I say “word” not “werd” no matter what EvillMonkey has to say). That’s all for now. Oh, by the by, Mr. Monkey, sir, if you’re reading this, we have more in common than you may realize. Just read bits of your journal today. I, unlike you, are not usually quiet, but there are things (quite similar to your own ramblings) that I think about often, and write about incessantly. cheers.

last day of work

As I expected, I’m feeling both sad and relieved at the same time. I wish I could stay and work on the projects that I have going, but unfortunately that’s going to be someone else’s job. I feel really protective about my projects… not so much the dull stuff like photocopying things for patrons (even if it’s RFK stuff) but more like the Swain or Eisteddfod stuff… those are my babies (especially the Eisteddfod). I started that project. I got Prof. Glasser to talk to Judy. I began it. And I can’t finish it. It’s a really long and involved thing that is going to take years. I’ve never had a job that I actually liked what I do. All my other jobs have been things to just make money, and it was bearable only if I liked my co-workers. My co-workers here are great, but I actually like the work I do, too.

I feel relieved though, since I’ll move on away from UMD… I still feel like a student here. Judy said she’s considered keeping me as an O3, but since four of those employees classified as 03 (no benefits or union) just got sacked (or rather, laid off, but it’s the same thing, really), there’s no hope for that. The cataloging department is down to Pearl. Just Pearl, and no one else! ILL has lost another, and Photographics lost Justin… everyone is so bogged down with work, and things are going to move slower than ever. The people that are essential are getting laid off, while non-essentials (but those with seniority) are allowed to stay. It’s crazy, man. “Everything is wrong.”

I’ll be starting CM, probably in September, but I’d like to swing it sooner, ’cause we’ll need the monies. I’m joining the Y, ’cause it has air conditioning, and it’s cheap. I’ll be going with Colleen in the mornings before she goes to work. She’s about to get laid off as well, so she’s looking for a job as Manager at that awful Ham place… ew. But it’s a job, I guess. This wasn’t intended as a “the world sucks” kind of post, but it has sort of devolved into that….

moving on… I listened to “NO!” again today. Jesse finally burned “Mink Car” and “They Got Lost” from Evan, so I can give those back. I know Evan’s been having withdrawls from “Mink Car” so he’ll want it back. I still haven’t told him about that surf place in NH that has lessons. I hope he’ll be able to come. And if he can’t come that weekend, then perhaps another. They’re leaving on the twenty-somethingth, though… argh. I can’t believe they’ll be gone for that long. Crazy, I tell you.

Posted by Babs @ 06/27/2003 11:22 AM EST

This is the Summer I learn to surf… for real

Every summer since the age of thirteen, I’ve said that to myself. This year I’m going to do it. Evan and I have a pact that we will at least get out to take one lesson before he and Heather leave (for like 5 years) to go to the midwest. They’ll be landlocked, and we need to do this before they leave.

I’m going to be in North Hampton for the B-52’s concert in July, and I found this surf shop that has rentals and lessons and stuff…. so perhaps we can co-ordinate for that.

My surf obsession is really going to materialize this year. No more just watching “Endless Summer” a thousand times… I bought Surf Culture: an Art History of Surfing to get me motivated, and I found this photo frame decorated with a surf board motif to put my first surf photo in. sigh.

this time, I’ll really do it. I promise.

whew!

I finally got the upstairs looking like someone actually lives there. It no longer looks like a storage unit, but actual rooms! whee!

Of course, I did wait until the last possible time on my four day weekend to actually get stuff done, but it did get done. And if I do say so myself, it looks pretty nice.

I borrowed HP5 from Heather. She reads lightning fast, and was done in 8 hours. I, however, am taking longer than I expected. I read for about 3.5 hours yesterday and am only on page 200 and something. I keep having to re-read parts of it, because I keep reading too fast and skip lines. My eyes are pretty excited about the story, and I suppose they just can’t stop looking ahead a few lines. The battle in my head looks a little like this:

“Skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead!”

“Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”

“Skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead!”

“Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”

“Skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead!”

“Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”

“Skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead, skip ahead!”

“Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!”

you get the idea. It’s gotten to the point where I have to cover up the bottom of the page so my eyes don’t get ahead of themselves. I’m absolutely loving the story so far. I’m wicked pissed at a couple of characters, but I won’t say more here just in case some of my friends haven’t read it yet. Melissa is coming over today, and I hope I can read enough of the book to be caught up with her, although she’s probably finished by now. Ok, get to work!

Toothbrush! You’ve come back to me!

Now I’m just trying to get my brain to follow suit…

I’m feeling pretty icky these days. I have so much work to do, and it seems like I can’t find the motivation to do any of it. I’m feeling practically as overwhelmed as I was at the end of the semester, but I’m not sure how I’ve managed to work myself up like that considering I don’t have any deadlines, really.

Well, I have only one week (really three days, not counting today) left of this job, and then I will be unemployed for a little while. Alex called me (from ArtWorks! in New Bedford) and I have to call him back today… That’s where I did my internship and got some summer work last year. I wonder what work they’ve got in store for me this time around. Pretty good timing, I think. They always seem to know when I need work! If they’re willing to pay me (some stuff has been volunteer) and willing to give me enough hours to make the commute worth it, then I’ll consider it, but if it’s only a little money and a little time, then it probably won’t cover the expense of fuel to get down there and back every day… not to mention the fact that we have just the one car, and I’d have to figure out a driving plan with Jesse’s second shift. hmmmmmm… we’ll see. Hmm, artworks, that reminds me… I’ve got to drop Ana a line or two. She invited me to her show in Chicago (like I’d be able to make it) a million years ago but I never dropped her a line saying that I got the invitation and ‘thanks for thinking of me’ etc… I can be so neglectful at times… gotta work on that.

I’ve got that pampered chef party tonight… and I’ve got my eye on this really cool cake pan… you can make a checkerboard cake… pretty cool. Last time, I got this neat shaped bread tube thing. It’s pretty neat. You put the dough in the tube, and bake it, and it comes out in this neat shape. Alright, my verbal description skills are seriously lacking today. Here, check this out.

oy, smeg head!

Here’s a little snippet of what went on at Marc’s wake… we laughed, we cried, we goofed around in the parking lot, then went to the “pearl” for “chinese” food. You know, same old same old.

and check out the new 20cent site… good work, John!

I’m busy busy working on getting rid of a bunch of stuff. I’m doing pretty good so far. I having no problem getting rid of useless stuff that I’ve collected recently, but as for things from my past… now that’s a different story all together. But I’m working on it. My strategy is to take photos of things that I’m having more difficulty getting rid of, and then it makes the whole process more palitable. I figure, I may not have the actual thing, but I’ll still have a concrete memory of it and not just an in my brain memory, ya know?

Posted by Babs @ 06/17/2003 10:53 PM EST

Isn’t this rediculous?

I talked to Denise on the phone yesterday, and she saw Marc a couple of weeks ago (I hadn’t seen him since the end of April at No Exit) and apparantly he had cleaned himself up and was taking better care of his body by not abusing it with all that shit. Somehow knowing that he had finally thought better of himself and cleaned up makes his death all the more sad. He was cleaning himself up, about to finish his novel, and then like that… he’s gone. It’s all so absurd.

On the way home from Joe’s the other night I started to cry again. But it wasn’t like the tears that I had been shedding previous to that. The other tears were for people like Sandra and Kevin and Michelle and Marc’s parents and family… people who were close to him and are really suffering. Up until then I hadn’t realized how much Marc was a part of my life, too. We were never close, but he was part of the same group of people with whom I associate: Twenty Cent Fiction. Up until we graduated, there wasn’t a week that went by that I didn’t see Marc. We worked together in three plays. Up until the drive home Wednesday night, it hadn’t occured to me that I would have to grieve, too. Not just the kind of empathic grieving that you do when you know someone you care about has lost someone they care about. It makes me realize that I’m closer to the people in Twenty Cent than I had previously assumed.

Of course I know that some of my closest friends are also (or were) members of Twenty Cent, but I didn’t realize how connected I was to the entity of Twenty Cent itself.

Jesus, this is all so stupid!

I don’t even know what I think… And reading over what I’ve written sounds so inane and well, lame… UGH!

will night never come?

Well, I guess it’s come for you, Marc. Not that I think you can hear me or anything… well, maybe you can, what do I know about these things… anyway… I hope you’re in a good place, wherever that may be.

Rest in Peace.

I know we weren’t close this last year or so, but I have some good memories. There are a lot of people down here who gave a shit about you, and they’re hurting pretty badly right now. You know, not to tokenize you or anything, but having someone the same age as myself (give or take a little time) just up and die like this is really scary. You were up to some crazy stuff these last couple of years, and you neglected and abused your body. I just wish you would have seen your value in time so that (if this accident was caused by insulin shock like we’re assuming, but I don’t want to contribute to rumors) you would have taken care of yourself. Again, not to make you the “token death boy” or anything, but maybe now some people will shape up their lives after having seen how quickly life can be taken away.

I really have no more to say right now, and it’s not like you can hear me or anything, anyway.

Note: added Thursday, June 12, 2003
Here’s a link to the twenty cent fiction website with a reprint of the obituary and an article from the Patriot Ledger and a photo of Marc. The photo was taken from Twenty Cent’s production of Waiting for Godot two Decembers ago.

It’s evolution, baby!

Ever since I read Daniel Dennet’s Darwin’s Dangerous Idea, the word meme has been popping out at me all over the place. I had never heard of the word (not having read Dawkins) before I read DDI, and now it’s everywhere. I see memetic evolution in every culturally constructed element of society. It demonstrates how we place value on certain things that have nothing to do with the well being of our human bodies, communities, etc. Instead we value logos and labels. Check out memefest to see what’s going on out there to take back cultural evolution.